Just saw “The Solitude of Prime Numbers” and inspired me to buy the book which sits on my shelf as I’m writing this. Every single day I hear or read about people complaining about their loneliness and how much they yearn for a life companion.
Let me tell you something true: having someone in your life doesn’t necessarily means you’re going to be blissfully happy. I’ve seen couples who’ve been married for years or are in a long relationship and feel utterly and completely ALONE. Their suffering is even more acute than the loneliness most of us complain about.
Don’t get me wrong. I’ve been alone all my life and it sucks! The feeling comes in waves and it doesn’t fully disappear. Hides and creeps you out from time to time. Christmas is an all time favourite; holidays are bipolar: they bring us happiness and sorrow throughout. Good news is you’re not alone and aloneness doesn’t necessarily translate into loneliness.
Hard? YES. Impossible to achieve? NO. You’re not Eleanor Rigby! Remember The Beatles’ song? Written with such dark cynicism!
Fill your days with work and hobbies and don’t give your brain time to ask “why everybody else is in a happy relationship and I’m not?” “Am I the only one on earth whose always completely and utterly alone?” NO, YOU’RE NOT! Occupy your time with anything and everything that makes you feel useful and DO NOT obsess about “not having someone to make you happy”. You have to BE HAPPY ALL BY YOURSELF FIRST.
Important note: If you suffer from depression? GO TO YOUR DOCTOR. If you don’t have one? SEARCH FOR ONE because it’s not something you can control. Depression or Bipolarity are diseases just like Cancer or Diabetes are. The right doctor will put you under the right treatment in order to avoid despair and the feelings of loneliness.